Still Single? Overcome This Little Known Myth

Have you ever felt like others have been blessed with the ability to attract and nurture a great relationship, while you seem to only know how to make each relationship end in disaster? You want a relationship as badly as they do, and you deserve it as much too. So, what is the difference that gives them an edge?

Let me share something personal that might help. I had a beautiful baby boy almost six weeks ago. I'm finally coming out of the fog and recovering from a tough delivery, countless nighttime feedings, and the stress of figuring out a new baby. It's interesting, everyone always talks about a mother's instincts. As I have begun the journey again as a mother, I have once again been reminded what mother's instincts are, and what they are not.

Before becoming a mom myself, I thought that mother's instincts were super powers that allowed the mom to understand and meet her baby's every need. Needless to say, I was devastated when this magical gift was not granted to me when my children were born. Instead, I felt very confused and less than adequate. What I did instinctually have was a passion to do whatever it took to care for my child. I'd be willing to go to the ends of the earth for him, even if that meant living on no sleep and getting spit up in my hair on a daily basis.

Now that I have become acquainted with many other mothers, I know that the magical omnipotent power of mothering does not exist. Other mother's instincts are like my own. We don't do everything perfect, we all want to do the very best we can for our kids from the moment they are born.

This morning as I thought about this again, I realized this is also very true in our relationships with our spouse. I believe that each of us also has an instinct to be in a good relationship. However, just like a mother's instinct, this desire doesn't naturally endow us with the skills necessary to create that relationship. We have to learn that part, just as a new mother must learn how to best nurture her new child. By turning to those who have figured out relationships, we can turn our instinctual desire into practical application, and create the relationship we naturally yearn for.

So, when you find yourself discouraged because you are single or at the end of another relationship disaster, don't be discouraged. You have the desire and instincts it takes to be in a good relationship. You just need the guidance to build what you wish into reality. Today is the day to stop doing it alone and ending up in the same dead end pattern. Now is the time to gain the courage to ask for help. Once you know the skills necessary and start applying them, you will be ready to find and nourish the relationship you deserve to have.

Article Source: http://www.rightbiz.com

If you are lonely and single, starting a companionship, or healing from heartache, Wendy Bridger, MSSW, provides you with the tools you want to create a soulmate companionship.

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