The Art of Empathy

Empathy is the ability to identify with and the vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another person. Empathy is the capacity to understand and respond to the other's experiences.

This has had untold benefits in my persuasion for years and now I'm sharing it with you.

First, an exercise to get into the mindsets of our affluent clientele. . .

This is about understanding and being responsive of your client or prospect's experiences and reality. You're going to have the experience of being them.

When someone feels that kind of trust - where you are actually experiencing what they are going through - rapport is never far behind.

With loved ones whose patterns we know and understand, this comes naturally. This exercise you will give you an insight to people you don't know that well (if at all).

You will need a role play partner for this one.

Ask your partner to think of anything. Call it 'A'. Notice how their body is arranged - facial features, breathing, muscle tension, gestures, etc. - and take a mental snapshot. This is how they represent thought 'A'.

Break this state by having them stand up, walk around briefly, and name three things that they can see in the room. . . a coffee cup, photograph, bookshelf. . .etc. This reverts them back to their normal state.

The next step is to have them think of something entirely different--not opposite, just different--and call this thought 'B'.

[NOTE: When you first do this exercise thinking of the opposite may make it easier, but I encourage you to develop your skills and not use something opposite once you've got the hang of it.]

And break the state again.

Next, have them think about either the A or B thought, without telling you which. Your job is to tell which one they're thinking about, just by looking at them. Which snapshot do they resemble the most?

Once you've done this enough times, switch roles and let them enjoy the experience of being able to tell what you're thinking. You can begin to really know the people you deal with regularly.

Of course you're not going to practice this and role play with your prospects. This is an exercise to fine-tune your observation skills and should be done with friends or co-workers.

Eventually you'll be able to recognize the smallest of changes in their states as you talk with them.

And maybe they won't exactly be able to pinpoint the feelings they are getting, but they will feel a connection with you.

What's the point? It's just another way to gain fast and powerful rapport at the same time putting your prospect into a state where they are feeling understood.

Another way this can be valuable is in determining whether or not a client is lying. Not that you need to interrogate a client, but knowing if someone's fibbing is always useful.

If someone explains that their finances are "perfect" but they are slouched or some other physical clue tells you they're being incongruous, this is really a dead giveaway that they don't have an ideal financial picture.

You can use this along with other persuasion strategies to gain that deep sense of trust and rapport with your prospects getting to the heart of their needs, wants and desires, with your product or service becoming the answer they were looking for.

Article Source: http://www.rightbiz.com

Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to earn the business of wealthy prospects using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion techniques.

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